BabaKiev Pastebin

SCPs:

^{SCP-XXXX before being retrieved}

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be contained in a hermetically sealed box of .15m X .15m X .15m located in a security locker locked with a standard combination padlock located in the storage unit of site-█. Ventilation of the storage unit has been diverted to the outside air supply only and all connections with other site ventilation shafts blocked. Air circulating the storage is to be filtered to remove traces of [DATA EXPUNGED].

D-class personnel slated for testing are not to have record of sexual offences. Additionally, any personnel handling the SCP are to be equipped with a respirator. Ideally, security personnel for the testing of SCP-XXXX are to be selected based on the diagnosis of Anosmia on their medical record.

All personnel that have come into contact with SCP-XXXX are to be slated for a physical examination as well a psychological evaluation at the beginning and end of each work week. Additionally, personnel that enter the testing chambers are to be subjected to a thorough shower before and after leaving the chamber as well as wear a class-A hazmat suit.

Description: SCP-XXXX appears to be a can of “███ ██████” body spray manufactured by the ████ ███ energy drink company. It was retrieved from a house in the █████ area of ████, France after reports of domestic violence were received from neighbors of the residence from which the item was retrieved. Upon investigation, SCP-XXXX was found resting amidst empty cans of ███████ brand energy drink. Also in the room was the mutilated corpse of X█████ A██████ whose head was removed at the neck and [REDACTED]. One E█████ W██ was found curled in the fetal position. Class A amnesiacs were administered to the residents of the household and stories were planted in local media that they had eloped to an unknown location in the French countryside.

General inspection of SCP-XXXX reveals it to be no different than other cans of similar body spray. However, when the contents of the can are sprayed on living cells of any type those cells begin to emit a pheromone chemically similar to that of a member of the Mantodea family. This pheromone has been observed to cause an almost instantaneous arousal in those that smell it while the wearer of the body spray will usually describe it as being “a little musky".

Subjects affected by the potent pheromone in SCP-XXXX undergo a notable change in sex drive. Regardless of previous gender preferences and even species all living organisms that smell the pheromone are instantly attracted to the wearer such to the point that impeding their progress towards sexual gratification with the test subject has elicited a violent reaction from the subject.

If allowed to proceed with mating behavior, subjects will copulate as expected for their respective species for approximately █ hours at which time the subject smelling SCP-XXXX will proceed to violently decapitate the test subject and [DATA EXPUNGED]. After successful implantation of ovaries by an unknown means, the subject will enter a catatonic state and curl up, now known to be a form of self-preservation owing to the immense energy cost of [DATA EXPUNGED]. At this point the original subject is devoid of vital signs, but oddly still susceptible to stimuli as attempts to rouse test subjects have yielded sudden ‘jerky’ movements in response. If allowed to gestate for a period of █ days specimens of SCP-XXXX-1 begin to emerge from the body of the subject and proceed to [DATA EXPUNGED]. Tests regarding SCP-XXXX’s sentience or biological classification as ‘living’ have come back negative and any relation of SCP-XXXX to SCP-XXXX-1 is unknown.

The autopsy of subjects involved in experiments thus far have revealed that test subject’s cells exhibited new genes related to the pheromone produced. Subjects that have smelled SCP-XXXX also exhibit new genes, albeit in a different way. It was revealed that hormonal production was elevated immediately following inhalation and that the particular hormones caused a cascade of protein complex changes that result in the physiological change of genitalia into [DATA EXPUNGED].

Addendum-XXXX-A: Test log

All experiments performed on SCP-XXXX are to be logged here. - Dr. ████

Experiment XXXX-1
Name: Dr. █████████ interviewing the test subject with doctors ████ and ███████ observing remotely
Date: ██/██/19██
Procedure: Test subject(Male, 27, D-30169) was instructed to spray a reasonable amount of SCP-XXXX on his person with Dr. ████████ present to interview
Results: Forceful termination of Dr. ████████ along with █ security personnel. Subject D-30169 declared dead and testing chamber cleared. Autopsy showed cause of death to be [DATA EXPUNGED].

<Transcribed audio log available>

Document XXXX-1-D
<Begin audio log>
Dr. ████████: Please proceed as you have been instructed and we’ll commence questioning.
D-30169: Sure, anything for a pretty face.
D-30169 complies and spraying sounds are audible as he applies SCP-XXXX
Dr. ████████: Thank you, that’ll do █████. Now, do you feel at all different from the initial condition you reported?
D-30169 sniffs his armpits
D-30169: No ma’am. This stuff’s kinda stinky. You sure it’s some sorta aphro-whatever?
Dr. ████████: I can assure you it most certainly is…you [DATA EXPUNGED].
D-30169: Doctor?
Dr. ████████ puts down her clipboard and undoes her ponytail
Dr. ████████: Please, call me █████.
D-30169: Alright █████, are you tryin’ to seduce me?
Dr. ████████ gets up from her chair unbuttoning her blouse
Dr. ████████: No, but you sure are making me [DATA EXPUNGED]!
Noises are heard to indicate that Dr. ████████ has mounted D-30169 and [DATA EXPUNGED]
Dr. ████████: [incomprehensible]
at this point security personnel were dispatched to apprehend Dr. ████████
<End audio log>

Note:Shame we had to lose such a spunky junior researcher. To be honest, it was just a matter of time with the way she dressed. At any rate, we understand better just how SCP-XXXX operates and how to safely test with it. -Dr. ████
Experiment XXXX-2
Name: Dr. ██████████ and Dr. ████ observing remotely
Date: ██/██/19██
Procedure: Test subejct (Male, 34, D-31894) Instructed to apply SCP-XXXX per standard application with another D-Class (Female, 26, D-31895) present who will be blindfolded and instructed to wear earplugs.

Results: [DATA EXPUNGED]. Samples of air, clothing, and body cells exposed to SCP-XXXX will be collected for molecular examination.
Note: Following this incident, hereby classified incident XXXX-2, I’m instituting a strict background check policy. This is a gruesome reminder of the consequenses of security oversight. At least we know it operates through sense of smell. -Dr. ████
Experiment XXXX-3
Name: Dr. ████ observing remotely. Dr. ██████████ requested transfer following incident XXXX-2
Date: ██/██/19██
Procedure: Test subject (Female, 29, D-31981) instructed to apply SCP-XXXX per standard application with one(1) Canis familiaris of the labrador retriever breed (Male, 4), hereby referred to as subject 2, present.
Results: Subject 2 proceeded to attempt to engage in mating with Test subject. Subject 2 was reprimanded by security personnel equipped with personal atmospheric filtration devices. Subject 2 became violent and bit personnel, attempting to return to the testing chamber. After two(2) weeks of quarantine, subject 2 has not shown any decrease in violent behavior and was terminated after complaints of the noise disrupting productivity became greater.
Note: Perhaps a dog was not the best test subject. The heightened sense of smell may increase efficacy of SCP-XXXX. We do know, however, that the pheromones released by XXXX doesn’t just affect humans. -Dr. ████
Experiment XXXX-6
Name: Dr. ████ observing remotely.
Date: ██/██/19██
Procedure: Test subject (Male, 37, D-32885) instructed to apply SCP-XXXX in the presence of subject 2 (Male, 47, D-32887, Diagnosed with anosmia when handed over to Foundation custody) and subject 3 (Female, 25, D-32886).
Results: Subject 2 completely ignored the test subject and even expressed surprise when subject 3 [DATA EXPUNGED]. Subject 2 was removed from the testing chamber with no difficulty and subject 3 allowed to continue activity for █ days to establish normal conditions.
Note: This one went well, I must say. It would appear that SCP-XXXX is capable of altering physiology and producing offspring. I’ve petitioned O5 to allow me to test on what will be henceforth be deemed SCP-XXXX-1. -Dr. ████
Experiment XXXX-7

Name: Dr. ████ and Agent ██████ observing remotely
Date: ██/██/19██
Procedure: Test subject (Female, 35, D-32986) instructed to apply SCP-XXXX as in previous tests. Another subject (Female, 34, D-32987), hereafter referred to as Subject 2 was place with the test subject.
Results: [DATA EXPUNGED]. Subject 2 continued to react violently to separation with the test subject until the termination of the test subject.
Note: We honestly expected this one, but it was quite the show anyway. I had to chastise Agent ██████ for [REDACTED]. It would appear that the effects of SCP-XXXX are indiscriminate in all determinable areas. If it has a pulse, it gets [REDACTED]. -Dr. ████

Addendum-XXXX-B: Personnel able to access SCP-XXXX has been updated following incident XXXX-2.

Note: Think logically here, people. Do we honestly want convicted sex offenders as test subjects for an item that causes [DATA EXPUNGED]? I didn’t think so. Put them on 110-Mantauk duty or something. -Dr. ████

Addendum-XXXX-C: Security protocol updated following experiment XXXX-6. Personnel with a diagnosis of anosmia are deemed unaffected by SCP-XXXX

Note: Well duh. -Dr. ████

+Bucket of Stink


^SCP-XXXX

+Contagious Vandalism

+Human Furnace

+Ozymandias' Compendium

-Ozymandias' Compendium

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be contained in a chamber that is controlled for light, temperature, and humidity so as to preserve the pages and the binding. It may be closed while not in testing and no attempt is to be made to open the book in any way should it be in a state of revision in accordance with the order following Incident-XXXX-3.

Description: SCP-XXXX appears to be a simple, old, leather bound book of possible English origin. A red silken “bookmark” has been observed sticking out of the book at times and will occasionally change positions, these changes should be reported to the nearest member of research staff and documented immediately.

Study of the contents of SCP-XXXX reveal it to be a complete and comprehensive guide to the downfall of every civilization in history, even pre-recorded history. The book has been observed on a few occasions to engage in a self-revision of sorts wherein it will immediately shut, the “bookmark” will retract, and a series of scratching sounds will be audible and have been described as being “like an old quill pen on parchment”.

SCP-XXXX poses a grave infohazard due to the contradictory accounts given of various events and the more recent events that have been documented. No mention has been made of The Foundation within the compendium as of yet, but researches monitor every new revision for any mention The Foundation’s downfall.

Addendum: Incident report XXXX-3
After the completion of a standard testing cycle on SCP-XXXX the object went into a “revision”. A D-class personnel proceeded to attempt to open the book and his hand was immediately pulled inside. After an hour of intense screams, the subject was able to pull his hand out of the book. The page to which he had been affixed contained traces of his DNA and further testing revealed that the ink, slightly discolored from the usual black, was the subject’s dried blood, the page was composed of the subject’s skin cells, and that the words had been written in the subject’s hand and with his vernacular.
Note: Let’s just leave sleeping dogs lie, shall we? -Dr.

+Monochromatic Man

-Monochromatic Man

^SCP-XXXX

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-XXXX has made no attempt in his tenure with the foundation to escape, as such he is deemed non-threatening to the Foundation and is to be allowed general access to the site in which he is contained on the grounds that his good behavior continue. On multiple occasions XXXX has been helpful as a member of the consulting research staff. He is to be kept within standard living quarters in an unused section of sector. So far he has requested the following:

Minimal security precautions may be taken when interacting with XXXX and he may be approached by any non D-class personnel. He has been given level 2 clearance and may petition for access to higher level areas should the need arise. Under no circumstances is XXXX allowed to be in contact with any of the following SCPs.

No personnel is to be allowed any greater than twelve(12) hours of access to SCP-XXXX on any given day. Personnel interacting with XXXX for significant amounts of time, greater than or equal to four hours, are to submit to a physical examination at the end of the week.

Description:
SCP-XXXX is a younger man of anglo-saxon descent. He prefers to be addressed as █████, though has expressed no great disdain for his numerical classification. He is generally amiable and cooperative with Foundation staff and has shown no inclination to leave Foundation custody or challenge his current housing situation.

While normal in all aspects, SCP-XXXX appears completely devoid of color and pigment giving him the look of a vintage photograph. XXXX reports that he was born in 18██ and this information is corroborated by the style of clothing he was found in and the style of furniture that he prefers. In addition to being monochromatic, SCP-XXXX’s voice notably sounds like “an old scratchy record” from a late nineteenth century phonograph.

It has been observed that SCP-XXXX’s monochromatic effect is transmutable to objects that are XXXX’s vicinity for any substantial amount of time, determined to be approximately fourteen(14) hours at minimum for objects of less than or equal to 43.09kg(95lbs).

Addendum-XXXX-A: Interview

+Banshee

-Banshee

^SCP-XXXX

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: Is to be contained in a 1M x 1M x 1M soundproofed chamber with a plastic laminate further insulating the inner sanctum. Nutrient drips and narcotics are to be changed thrice daily by no less than four personnel with level 2 clearance outfitted with advanced hearing protection devices. Should SCP-XXXX awake from chemically induced coma, procedure 348-Ernst is to be initiated immediately and a level 2 lockdown must occur.

Description: SCP-XXXX appears to be a human female of approximately 25 years of age. She has scars on her upper abdomen from an invasive upper respiratory surgery. A special soundproof resin has been surgically bolted to maintain closure of the mouth. SCP-XXXX has not shown any capacity for speech, whether it be recognition or repetition and all tests in this line of inquiry have been suspended indefinitely pending O5 order.

As a result of the past surgical experimentation SCP-XXXX exhibits the ability to produce a hypersonic sound from enhanced vocal chords. This hypersonic burst has the capacity to incapacitate electronics, rupture blood vessels in mammalian craniums, and resonate with solid objects until they are destroyed. This ability, along with a great hostility makes XXXX a grave threat in the event of a security breach. For these reasons, all testing on SCP-XXXX in an active state are to be suspended indefinitely pending O5 order.

Addendum: Incident log XXXX-D
During a routine exchange of IV drips, SCP-XXXX awoke from chemically induced coma and proceeded to emit the highest recorded hypersonic sound in history. The effects of these waves were effective within a radius of approximately 70km and all personnel onsite were hospitalized afterward with severe hemorrhaging in the skull. All electronic communications were disrupted for a period of nine(9) hours and half the containment section were completely toppled. SCP-XXXX was retrieved after a collapsing support beam knocked her unconscious. Following this incident, The Foundation has developed procedure 348-Ernst to deal with the possibility of future awakening incidents and XXXX’s chemical drip cocktail is to be prepared with a level of variety such that her physiology does not adapt and become resilient to the chemicals.

+Death by Diet

-Death by Diet

^{SCP-XXXX after having been altered to no longer exhibit anomalous properties}

Item #: SCP-XXXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXXX is to be contained in the original manila folder in which it was retrieved in a locked cabinet in the office of Dr. ████. Any persons wishing to gain access to SCP-XXXX in any way must complete and submit the appropriate security acquisition forms for review and have a scheduled time for pre-approved activities filed at least 48 hours in advance of the date in question. Personnel that access SCP-XXXX are to be guarded by at least one level-1 security guard (more if the situation demands, as would be the case with a full-scale test procedure) and subjected to psychological evaluation within 24 hours with a follow-up evaluation in a further 24 hours after which time the subject shall be deemed to be no longer in need of evaluation for XXXX exposure. Should any member of personnel show signs of XXXX’s influence, either physically or emotionally, beyond the initial 48 hour period, the subject in question is to be quarantined and fed intravenously.

Description: SCP-XXXX was recovered in ████████, ██ after reports of anorexia nervosa amongst students of ████████ ████ ██████ increased drastically and many students went missing. A number of copies were found in houses across the county and all but one were destroyed. Any reports of increases in cases of anorexia nervosa, of people rapidly losing weight, or of people disappearing in the same county area are to be delegated to internal Foundation agents as a report of a wild XXXX so that it may be contained in a timely manner.

SCP-XXXX is a poster advertising a diet plan for teenagers that causes marked behavioral changes in those who view it. Subjects viewing XXXX for any amount of time experience the psychological symptoms of anorexia nervosa proportional to the amount of time spent viewing SCP-XXXX and the amount of time elapsed since viewing. Subjects also begin to experience accelerated weight loss and muscle atrophy after a period of 24-48 hours which increases exponentially for every day past the initial day in which this was recorded.

Subjects report feelings of inadequacy and disgust when questioned about their physique subsequent to viewing regardless of their opinion before. While it would seem that anyone may be affected by SCP-XXXX, the affects seem to be inversely proportional to the distance a subject is from being teenage. That is to say a fifteen year old male would be more susceptible to SCP-XXXX than would a 50 year old male even if the 15 year old reported stronger positive self-image initially.

Addendum:

Tales:

+Click

-Click

Click
The lights flicker three in rapid succession and stay on shedding a ghastly pale glow across the dim interior of Dr. Kiev’s flat. He shakes himself slowly from his sleepy state with a cup of coffee, the same putrid coffee he’s been drinking every morning for years from the same cup in the same dingy kitchen. The monotony of his daily routine begins with waking up to a cup of this awful brew and a rinse in a shower of yellow linoleum, white when he bought the flat.

Click
The door to his car opens slowly, but steadily. The car is old, and signs of continued use are prevalent everywhere on its chassis from the chipped blue paint to the ripped back seat to the crunchy front bumper. It sputters slowly to life when the key is placed in the steering column and turned sideways. The engine coughs black all over the driveway and many times Dr. Kiev has imagined taking lungfulls of the ashen substance as the tolling misery of schedule and order burrows deeper and deeper into his psyche.

Click
The clock in Dr. Kiev’s office ticks away the time as the man stares down at a newly filed report. Something had occurred in a remote section of the sector he worked at and now he had to pay the consequences of the oversight of some junior researcher. It seemed like every day he had to contend with some deficient member of the workforce. The report was signed and whisked away without a second thought. The cost of repairs would surely be coming out of his monthly salary.

Click
Dr. Kiev’s pen hit the piece of paper like a mad and efficient bull, running over every crease with unrivaled precision. There were tests to run, results to observe, and observations to record all from the safety of a tiny little room reserved for researchers that weren’t exactly important to anything or anyone. Dr. Kiev’s brain was important, that’s why they kept safe and bored in this little room. The man standing next to Kiev thought otherwise and quite enjoyed the spectacle of two women engaged in some very steamy romance aggravated by a rogue canister of perfume.

Click
The filing cabinet ate the newly minted experiment report, as well as a disciplinary notice, like a voracious tiger devours its latest kill. The cabinet had long remained in that solitary office, and it would remain long after Dr. Kiev had left it. One of very furnishings in this horrible prison cell, the filing cabinet was the only thing that could rightly represent any order in this insane place but it was not enough for its human occupant. Kiev had wasted many an hour just rotting in this place, wondering why something so exciting in theory had nothing scintillating to offer him.

Click
The lock turned and Dr. Kiev entered his flat. The same slimy flat he had left not ten hours prior. It smelled of decay and hate, a special kind of stench that was borne of a mind malcontent with the world it inhabited. The TV was static, it had not had signal in so long that the doctor could not tell what the last thing he had heard of the outside world was. For him, the march of time’s plodding course had beat so hard that Dr. Kiev was dear to it.

Click
The flying metal tore through flesh and bone, destroying the vast intellect stored between the two. The lifeless fingers clasped that weapon in a icy grip. In that one moment they were more alive than they had been all day, that instant where thought stopped for Dr. Kiev more was going on in his brain than the last twenty-four hours. It was his last intrigue in this world as the body slumped and the head fell.

Click

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